Eternal Blood
by BrambleclawIsMyHomeboy12
Summary: Carlisle's full life. Starting with his time in Volterra Italy, and going all the way to a little past Breaking Dawn. Please R
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1:DARK SHADOWS**

**The building rose in front of him suddenly as if appearing from thin air. It jerked him from his thoughts and wrenched him back into the dark reality of his existence. He had been called hear by the supposed leader of the ruling coven because of his "strange" dietary habits. He had apparently become the oddity of his world, creating quite the name for himself. It was very contrasting to his previous life.**

**The only son of an Angelican pastor, he had had a somewhat bleak life. His mother had died during his birth, leaving him all alone with his father. His life had been very different than other children his age from the beginning, with only one parent he was guided solely by his fathers influence. His father led hunts for supernatural beings, hunting witches, werewolves, and, ironically, vampires. The hunts were misleading and unjust resulting in the murder of countless innocent beings, it was only after his father's retirement, when he passed on responsibility to his son, did they truly find a collection of true immortals.**

**In fact, he thought, that is why I'm standing here. Success has damned me to this life of loneliness, he thought this and the truth of this statement almost made him laugh at the irony. He had led his small band through the streets of downtown London, leading them to destroy the group of vampires living in the sewers. Upon their arrival the beasts had climbed out of the sewers, and seeing the small group of humans I front of them brandishing weapons and torches, turned and fled.**

**He had followed them, he recalled, through the streets. They were much faster than he but he kept running refusing to give up chase. The vampire at the back of the group had stopped almost causing him to run straight into the bloodsucking monster. It had turned on him with black eyes, slightly rimmed with red. It had gripped his shoulders in a vice-like grip, and no matter how he struggled he couldn't even hope to break it. The creature had opened his mouth to reveal two rows of gleaming white teeth which, he remembered, the vampire had slowly moved to his throat.**

**The pain had started as soon as the teeth pierced the flesh on his neck, sinking into the large live giving vein resting there. He would have screamed if, he could have moved, if only he hadn't been so shocked. He faintly heard the rest of his patrol behind him yelling, he couldn't have made out there voices if he wanted to, the world around him was spinning far to fast. The pain had ripped through his body setting every nerve ending in him on fire. It was unbearable but unable to open his mouth he wasn't able to put a voice to his pain.**

**He vaguely remembered the creature dropping him to the hard ground as the patrol came close enough to burn it with their torches. He remembered them yelling his name before accepting his death and leaving to follow the creature. His mind, fighting against the pain, had gone into survival mode. He knew he must get to shelter, to not, he knew would been certain death. With his limbs screaming with protest he had moved his broken body into the shelter of a nearby sewer. He then curled up in the soft, rotting food here and lay there succumbing to the darkness, but even as he fought off conciousness he had forced his mouth to stay closed, fear that his sreams would attract unwanted attention.**

**As he recalled this dark memory, now over a century old, it only reminded him of his nervousness of the current situation. He was meeting with the royals of his kind to discuss his eating habits. Apparently they found it strange to have a vampire who cared anything at all about the preservation of human life. Well, he thought, what they thought really made no difference to him. He was sticking to his beliefs, whether they wanted him to or not. And, as he walked towards the supposedly marvelous underground structure he couldn't help but feel a twinge of pride. Pride at being different. Pride in his beliefs. Pride in his accomplishments. And most importantly pride of his self-control.**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: AN INTERESTING COLLECTION

As he walked down the streets of Volterra, Italy he wondered why he had agreed to come to this place at all. Perhaps it was fear that motivated his footsteps and kept his eyes open for others of his kind. Perhaps it was excitement at perhaps getting to discuss his beliefs with someone who might not laugh at him. All the others of his kind he had seen, from the strange nomads wondering the countryside, to the odd Irish coven, had scoffed at his beliefs and afterwards had just steered clear of him entirely. Msybe these royals would see his point.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw something he took as what he was looking for. It was a figure, hardly an outline against the dark night, wearing a black cloak with the front of the hood fixed on his head. He took a step towards the mysterious figure, and it responded by walking over to him, easily clearing the distance in seconds. "Cullen?" The figure asked with a velvety baritone.

"Yes," he answered, "Are you with the Volturi?" The figure nodded and gestured to follow him. He led through the dark streets of the city keeping at a swift pace, he led them past many biuldings and Carlisle wondered when they were going to stop. The man stopped in front of a small building, it was made of stone much like the rest of the city. He took out a small key and inserted it into the keyhole in a small wooden door. He opened it and waved his arm to let Carlisle enter first.

Carlisle stepped in, through the door was a hallway dimly lit by torches hanging on the walls, they cast an odd glow over the walls making it look somewhat like a crypt. The cloaked figure lead them down the hallway and through two doors until they arrived in a large open area. Cast in stone like the majority of this city and its bouldings the chamber was well lit and, other than the two new arrivals, completely vacant.

Carlisle was so busy gazing he nearly jumped when from the opposite wall a door burst open and three figures emerged. They seemed to float over the ground the were wearing floor length black cloaks. The person at the head of the small group had shoulder-blade length black hair, he was smiling at Carlisle. The one slightly behind him and to his left had the same black hair only a bit shorter, but his expression was odd as if it had never experienced joy and would never be content with life. The third figure had slightly longer white hair and a stern expression written across his features.

"Thank you for delivering our guest Demetri." The one in front spoke with a voice higher than Carlisle's own. The figure next to Carlisle nodded and walked out of the room. "You must be Carlisle. Carlisle Cullen. It's a pleasure to meet you." He extended his hand and Carlisle shook it but when he tried to pull away the man kept a firm grip staring intenly at Carlisle's face. Carlisle widened his eyes in surprise at this, What was this man doing?

"Ah," said the man finally releasing Carlisle's hand, "so it's true. You abstain from human blood. Why do you do this?" His tone sounded merely curious so Carlisle decided it was best to answer no matter how wird the handshake had been. "I wont kill people. They have done nothing to me. They are innocent." He realized that his answer may have insulted his fellow vampires because judging by their gleaming red eyes they drank human blood. The man however seemed meerly thoughtful as he gazed at Carlisle as if he were gauging his answer.

"Well Carlisle, you are surtently the oddity of our world. I don't believe I have ever met another vampire like you." The man fell silent and once again gazed into Carlisle's eyes, as if he were looking for a different answer one he liked better. "I am Aro," he said after a long moment, "these are my brothers, Marcus," he said gesturing to the dark haired one, "And Caius." The two gave him a nod and Carlisle suddenly felt out of place here, like a tree in an open field.

"You are a curious case Carlisle Cullen. You are welcome to stay here if you wish, I would very much like to learn about your dining habits more in depth." Aro spoke again.

"I would like that. Thank you." Carlisle answered slightly taken aback by the offer.

"Good," he said, "Jane will show you your room." As he spoke a small vampire came into the room. She came up to Carlisle's stomach and hard dark ginger hair that flowed to her waist, she to wore a cloak. As she led Carlisle down the hall an odd feeling swept over him, a somewhat dark and ominous feeling, like whatever was going on here he was better off not involved in. However, he had already accepted Aro's offer and it would be rude to leave now. So as he stepped into his nw room he shook off his dark feelings and tried to make himself feel comfortable against the strange new surroundings.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3: A DEEP SICKNESS**

**He was thirsty, he needed to hunt. He could tell from the coal black eyes staring back at him from his reflection in the pool of water. Knowing that he needed to hunt did not help him tell Aro. How was he supposed to tell a vampire who drank human blood that he needed to hunt animals. Well however he would do it it had to be done. He turned to go into the small entrance building to the grand castle to find Aro.**

**As he walked towards the cavernous room where he had first met the estranged leader he heard and odd noise. Voices. Many voices talking at once. He smelled blood pulsing through the veins of the people on the other side of the room causing Carlisle to swallow the venom that flooded into his mouth. "What were they doing here?" he wondered as to why humans were walking openly among the largest coven of vampires in existence.**

"**Welcome citizens of Volterra, and visitors to our great castle." The voice of Caius echoed to Carlisle sensitive ears. The Volturi brother had let them in here, Carlisle was shocked, was Aro aware of this? He ran down the hall then burst into the large room at the end of the hall. Inside were about 30 humans staring in excitement at the beauty of the inside of the castle. Also in the room was the three brothers along with several members of their powerful guard. Carlisle's instincts screamed for him to attack the humans but he resisted, he had gone over 100 years without killing a single person and he wasn't about to start now.**

"**We are glad to have you here this marvelous day," Marcus spoke this time while gesturing for the guards to move in front of the doors. With a jolt Carlisle realized what was going on, the Volturi were feeding. He turned to leave but the guards had closed the doors trapping him inside.**

"**Indeed we have," said Aro, "but I'm afraid your visit is over." He waved his hand and the group serged forward. The strong smell of human blood hit Carlisle's senses as the humans were drained of it all around him. However, instead of feeling thirsty for a moment he felt queasy like he was going to be sick. He closed his eyes to avoid watching the gruesome murder scene and kept them shut until silence rang loudly in his ears.**

**Slowly opening his eyes he saw Aro standing in front of him with a curious look on his face. "How did you manage to do that?" he asked. "You are obviously thirsty and yet you controlled yourself the entire time. Amazing." He reached for Carlisle's hand to check his thoughts and his eyes widened in surprise as he saw Carlisle's disgusted feelings during their feed. The thoughtful look entered Aro's face again as he released Carlisle's hand. "You need to feed." It wasn't a question so Carlisle just nodded his agreement. "Then let us go." Aro finished gesturing towards the door.**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4: TWO SIDES OF THE SPECTRUM

Carlisle walked steadily beside Aro down the hallway to the entrance of Volterra's castle. He could not stop thinking of the humans faces, there looks of terror at the vampires he had seen before he had shut his eyes. He knew he would never, could never, bring himself to harm innocent people as he had just seen his companions do. He would never thirst for people like they did,. And perhaps with time he could manage his dream of becoming a human doctor. It was a longshot but, he would never give up, he would get his thirst under control enough to do what he loved.

They arrived at the small door and Aro took the lead pushing through it and stepping steadily into the cool night air of the city. The humans were safely in there houses and all was quiet. Aro led Carlisle dwon several streets before turning into a small set of woods just outside the city. "I am very curious as to see how you hunt these animals Carlisle." Aro said in a voice laced with curiosity. Carlisle nodded in response before pausing to check for the scent of something to drink. Elk.

They were slightly west of the small hunting party and Carlisle turned in that direction. He set of silently following the small herd with Aro following a couple steps behind. Up ahead he saw three elk in a small group, it would take all three to satisfy his burning throat. He leaped onto the back of the largest one, a buck, and sank his teeth deep into its neck, the warm blood filling his senses as it washed down his throat. He pushed away the drained corpse and moved on to the next one. He drained it quickly and then finished off the third. The whole event took only a few seconds and Carlisle was aware of Aro's curios stare trained on him the entire time he was hunting.

His throat has stopped burning and he hoped his eyes had already returned to their usual golden color when he turned to look at Aro. The older vampire was staring at Carlisle with a look mixed with amazement and curiosity. "How do you stand the taste? The smell is bad enough." He asked gesturing to the corpses at Carlisle's feet.

"It's worth putting up with," Carlisle answered simply, before he moved to bury the dead animals. He stepped on the dirt one last time before turning to join Aro on there trek back to the castle. He paused to glance at his reflection in a pool of water they passed. His eyes were back to his preffered shade of gold, so different than all the others.

"Of all the others of our kind I have seen," Aro spoke to him, "you are the only one I have ever seen who has even tried to differentiate from our natural food source. Why do you go through the trouble? I mean I have seen your thoughts and know your beliefs but, are beliefs really worth it? In my opinion you should drink human blood. You sould and save yourself the effort Carlisle." He finished and was obviously waiting for an answer.

Carlisle was shocked, he would never drink human blood. He would be a doctor someday no matter how long it took. "I will not be a murderer." He said at last not caring if he offended the elder vampire or not. Aro simply nodded and silence followed the pair all the way to the castle they both called home.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5: DEPARTURES AND UNANSWERED QUESTIONS**

**He was leaving. He had lived with the Volturi for over a century and he could take it no longer. It was the mid seventeen hundreds and he was tired of there countless attempts to force him to drink human blood. As far as Carlisle could see the only benefit of living at Volturi castle was he had been able to read the thousands of medical books they kept in the large library on the third floor.**

"**Goodbye Aro, Cauis, Marcus," he nodded to each of them in turn.**

"**Are you sure of your decision to leave Carlisle? You are still welcome to stay here." Aro spoke softly as if he expected Carlisle to say no but was trying one last time to get him to remain here. He simply nodded in response and moved to leave. He burst through the door and moved quickly through the city before clearing its gates and breaking into a run. He ran all the way back to his country of origin, back to London. He changed his direction to the sea and boarded the ship headed for the America's.**

**After months on a boat, which was rather difficult being in such close contact with humans, they arrived in North America. After the ship boarded in Boston Carlisle decided he should hunt, that he had pushed his luck enough already. After he had satisfied his burning throat, Carlisle decided to explore his new country. All around him people and there families were moving about in the busy aspects of life. There were butchers, candle makers, and weavers lining the streets, selling their goods to paaing citizens. As he gazed at small family's walking the streets he felt a pang of longing tug at his heart. Although he had lived with the Volturi for over 100 years he had not considered them family, half of them had gone out of their way to avoid him entirely. He guessed their toleration of him only came from their master's desire to keep him their to learn more of his diet.**

**He had lived in his own world for two hundred years, never finding another of his kind that shared his belief and after 200 years he doubted he ever would. He turned his thoughts to happier things, he had studied medicine and could now pursue his dream of becoming a doctor. Even if he spent the rest of it alone he knew his exisistence now had a purpose, now he would not only refuse to drink human blood but he would commit himself to saving human lives.**

**As he walked down the street he noticed people watching him intently. He turned to glance at himself just to make sure he was glinting, but no he wasn't. He suddenly remembered Aro mentioning once that humans found them alluring and unnerving at the same time. He guessed that not many of his kind would venture into a city full of humans, especially in daylight. He instinctively quickened his pace, but made sure to keep it human. He didn't like attracting attention, he almost laughed out loud at the irony of the statement, as he realized he would never fit into the world. Human or vampire.**

**He turned into a small in at the end of his street and went to sit down at the table in the corner of the room. Only a few people gave him mildly curious glances before returning to apparently more important matters. After sitting at his table alone for over an hour, listening to the soft conversations going on round him he decided he should leave and maybe find somewhere to stay. As he stood up one of the patrons gestured to him calling him over to their table. Cautiously, Carlisle made his way over there unable to imagine what they wanted with him.**

"**Hello there old boy." One of them said, the smell of alcohol heavy on his breath. "Sorry to bother you we were just wanting an opinion if you don't mind."**

"**Alright," Carlisle answered, aware of his English accent and how different it sounded from this man's speech. "An opinion on what?"**

"**The resistance." The man answered as if it were common knowledge. "It could use people ypur age. Were all signing up. You may want to look into it."**

**Carlisle just nodded, having no idea what they were talking about and he decided it was just a better idea to leave as soon as possible. What resistance? What was going on in this strange country? Well whatever it was Carlisle decided he should probably find out before he ended up in more conversations like the one at the inn.**


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6: FIRST PATIENT

Carlisle had successfully managed to survive two weeks in this new world. He had taken up residence at a small abandoned farm right outside Boston, he had bought the property from the local tax collectors and that's where he went to in the evenings to pretend to sleep. It was a nice place to live he supposed, it was close to woods which allowed him to hunt but not so remote so the couple of sick people who came to him could get there easy enough. He had made it, he was a doctor, with patients. He did all he could to help people who came to him laden with illness, it made him feel good.

He was aware, however, that some people who lived here would never feel comfortable enough around him to come see him. He guesses that while humans would likely never discover his secret in the entire truth, that their survival instincts kept them at a safe distance from him. It was like they knew they should stay away from him but they weren't quite sure why. Well, he thought, at least some of them had thrown that off and come to him for help.

However, he was not thinking of his doctor's duties at the moment. He was thinking of the odd conversation he had had with the man at the inn two weeks ago. The resistance he had spoken was that some of the colonists believed that they should separate from their mother country of England and develop their own government. Carlisle tried his hardest to avoid conversations regarding this topic, a near impossible feat. People were constantly asking each other what side they were on, the colonists or Yankees', or England's, the tories. He felt slightly uncomfortable with this topic being a native born Englishman, but all the same he felt attached to this new country, so when the topic came up his answer was always reminiscent to "undecided", and he planned to keep it that way.

Tap. Tap. A soft knocking sounded t his door, interrupting Carlisle's train of thought. He walked over to the door and swung it open. Standing in front of him was a frantic looking woman, along with a fairly large man carrying a small boy. "Please help him, he wont wake up." The woman begged, standing aside to let the man carry the child into Carlisle's parlor room. He set the small boy on the couch and stepped back to let Carlisle look at his son.

As he looked over the boy, Carlisle could feel the heat pouring from his skin in waves. He quickly removed the boys shirt afraid of what he might see. Sure enough there was a deep scarlet rash spreading over the boys chest. Scarlet fever, the deadly disease that had already claimed so many lives. Juding by the progression of the illness the boy didn't have that much time left. "Go and get some water," he told the woman gesturing to the small kitchen deeper inside the house. The man's eyes widened at his English accent but Carlisle pretended not to notice, the woman took no notice and ran to get the water.

Carlisle pressed his icy hand to the boy's burning forehead and he turned in his sleep unused to the temprature. Carlisle would do everything he could but he knew the effect it would have would be limited, the boy was in the hands of god now. His frantic mother returned with a rag dripping with water, and Carlisle pressed it to the boys head.

"I'm afraid he has the fever," Carlisle said to them. "I will do everything I can but, only god can help him now." The man nodded and his wife turned to bury her head into her husbands chest. The boy on the couch squirmed fitfully in his sleep, the fever giving him nightmares.

"We will take him home," The man spoke for the first time and moved to take the boy. The women thanked Carlisle and turned to follow her husband and dying sun out the door. As he watched them go Carlisle wondered with a pang if this is what being a doctor was going to be like. Telling people that there was no hope for their dying loved ones, that there was nothing he could do? He knew the expression on that womans face would follow him around forever, a haunting image forever ingrained into his mind.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7: A WAR FOR THE AGES**

**Well it had started. It being the revolution. The year being 1776 the war had started on American soil. The first shots fired between Americans and the Brittish had been fired at Lexington-Concord. The Americans, as they now called themselves, were using groups of untrained minuteman and small militia's who in Carlisle's opinion were exactly the greatest fighting force. However, this didn't damper there spirit, they continued fighting and it seemed to Carlisle that fear lay heavy on the hearts of the people of Boston.**

**He had fewer patients and he now spent more time in town. It was late fall so he had a reasonable excuse to wear his thick coat and hat. He listened for news on the war. American troops were moving to Valley Forge Fort for the winter. This worried him, soldiers at such close quarters meant illness was sure to spread, if you through in limited food, space, and blankets they could have a serious problem. **

**He sighed to himself as he though of the sick people he had treated in the last few years. The main problem was a diesease called Smallpox. It spread a rash over the sick persons body, causing it to itch while spurring a high fever, dry throat, loss of appetite which when combined, more often than not resulted in death. Many people had died and cramming people into such close quarters might result in a outbreak.**

**As he passed a small town in the new town he lived in Carlisle heard a fragment of an interesting conversation. "Yeah I heard Benedict turned over the West Point locations to the British because his wife likes to party a bit to much." This statement resulted in a laugh from everyone at the table. Carlisle quickly stepped into the door and took a seat at a neighboring table. **

"**Yeah," siad a man with a scraggely gray beard, "How did they catch him?"**

"**Heard they caught him as he came back from the British camp. He turned in the plans and they had to move all the troops from West Point out before the lobster backs got to 'em." Answered the man who had spoken first.**

"**What are they gonna do with the traitor?" Asked a younger man. "They gonna kill 'em?"**

"**Don't know," answered the bearded man, "Probably just lock him up for a while. He was a pretty good general up 'till now" Carlisle's heart pounded in his chest, would they kill this man? Would he hang from the gallows as countless others had done in this dark war? He hoped not.**

**He had noticed a change in all the people. The war had taken its toll on them. They had lost fathers, husbands, sons and countless loved ones from the war and all the destruction it carried with it. Whether lost to disease, famine, or enemy bullets the relatives people lost were gone forever. It had changed them making some of them hard hearted and openly cold to everyone, while others became somewhat lost. They lived day to day, not really caring about what was going on, the strength had crumbled taking their hope and drive with it. It sickened Carlisle and caused his heart to hurt seeing everyone like this. He just hoped, for everyone's sake, that this deadly was would end soon.**

**In the days and weeks that followed, the news did not improve. Now, to supplement everything else the weather had taken a freezing turn, causing food to become more scarce and shelter for the troops to be a necessity. The cold brought on new illness and with it came death. People were dying of smallpox, various infections, and turberculosis left and right. There were not enough doctors to keep up with demand, not that there was much they could do anyway. While the sickness was rampant, the doctors were few.**


	8. Chapter 8

_**Chapter 8**_

_**What he had feared had happened. The year had dipped into the dark days of winter, the air grew cold always holding the bite of frost with it, and the daylight grew shorter. He had heard a smallpox outbreak had occurred at the soldier fort, in fact that's where he was headed now. In his head he could already here the pained moans that would erupt from the people he would try desperately to save.**_

_**He arrived on his horse to find that he was correct. All over the small area troops were scattered, laying wherever there was room. He knew some of them were already dead for their lack of heartbeat, while others were holding on with all the strength they still had. He moved around the camp heading for the medical tent, but unlike normal hardly anybody acknowledged his existence. Death hung heavy in the air and it had destroyed their spirit, taking their will to do hardly anything.**_

_**As he opened the small tent he could see two tables covered with small medical utensils and a small pallet set on the ground holding a man. An elderly man was bent ove him checking for a pulse. Carlilse could tell that he would not find one, a pang of helplessness went through him, these people were dying and there was very little he could do for them. However, this feeling just made him more determined. **_

_**He spent the remainder of the day and the majority of the night delivering food and water to sick soldiers. He helped carry the soldiers to weak to move themselves into small cabins the major had had built. It was long work and Carlisle was thankful, for the first time in his long life, that he could never tire and he would always be able to help when it was needed.**_

_**The next day was much the same, they admitted more people laden with sickness. It was definitely smallpox, almost everyone who was sick already had the rash all over them. The small red bumps erupting from their skin were very distinguishable. Few recovered and almost all had died, to weak to carry on living. The burials were a hurried affair often carried out by people who had survived the disease. They mailed out death notices to countless families and the army sized had decreased dramatically even since Carlisle arrived.**_

_**Over the next week Carlisle had witnessed so much death that if he hadn't known better he would have said he was sick himself. Well he was sick, sick to his heart form the pain and death this war had brough to his new country. And he, like everyone else couldn't wait for the end of this war. No one but him was safe. Many of his fellow doctors had fallen ill, they were running low on people. As he moved back to his post he couldn't help but wonder when this this terrible war would be over.**_


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9 A New Dawn

It was over! The war was over, and America had gained its long wanted freedom from Brittain. They were forming a plan of government right now in Philedelphia, Pennsylvania. A group of delagates had formed to develop a working form of government for his new country. Carlisle now felt relief, where he had for so long felt the tug of hopelessness. He had resumed work as a doctor, caring for people when they needed it. After the war however, he had moved into the Appalachian region, he had stayed in one place for the entire war and it was time to move on.

He liked his new house. It was the perfect size, it could hold all of his things as well as provide enough room for patients when they turned up. It was placed in the center of an abandoned farm about a mile out of the small village. He didn't know the name of the town, not that it was really important. It was a quiet town with few people, perfect for it's resident vampire.

As happy as he felt with this new town and the end of the war, Carlisle still felt the longing for companionship. It was the one thing he longed for the most but it was also the one thing the money he made from this job, could not buy. He would have liked to have a wife but, so far no one human or vampire had sparked any interest in him, and as far as the other vampires were convinced, he was a freak.

He threw himself into his work, reading all the new medical texts he ordered from across the sea's, he worked with patients, and he even tested some things for himself. It distracted him but didn't ease the longing deep inside of him, he knew it would always be there, more than likely for the rest of eternity.

Dwelling on this train of though was depressing him, so he decided to take a walk in the night air. As he stepped out into the warm July evening he was met with a serene feeling of peace. No more fighting, no more wounded men, no more crying families, and most importantly no more death. Being alive for over one hundred years you wouldn't think that death would effect him this way. But it did.

All those deaths were burned into his brain as he tried to forget them. Another vampire curse, he supposed. Having perfect memory was very useful when treating patients, but not exactly fun when you were haunted by the faces of dying people. Their faces foever burned into his brain.

Carlisle shook his head to clear of his dark thoughts. He should be happy, like everyone else. In fact in town he could hear te shouts and gunshots as they celbrated their independence/ Being born Brittsh himself Carlisle was surprised by the depth of loyalty to this country. This is were he belonged. This is where he was able to be a doctor with out the constant watch of the ancient ones lingering over him everyday. And for once he felt happy.


	10. Chapter 10

_**Chapter 12: Columbus And the Girl That Lives There**_

_**He stands at the hospital reviewing some medical charts. Broken bones, stiches, and other various injuries were filling up the hospital. Today was different though, the hospital was quiet for the first time in months and Carlisle was beginning to relax.**_

_**1911. It was really 1911. 266 years ago Carlisle had been born in London. It was almost unfathomable, all the things he had lived through, and yet he had never changed, not once. Frozen at 23, he looked exactly the same, same height, same color hair, and not one wrinkle. It was almost amazing.**_

"_**Dr. Cullen," Nurse Andrews called, interrupting him from his thoughts. "We have a patient In room 12, which needs your assistance. Then your free to leave."**_

"_**Thank you," He answered, almost laughing at the dreamy gaze she gave him.**_

_**He walked down to the hallway towards room 12. The sound of muffled and suppressed sobs emmitted from the room. His hand closed around the door handle, denting it slightly, and he pushed the door open.**_

_**He froze. Sitting on the bed had to be the most beutifal person he had ever seen. Soft caramel hair, a beautiful heart shaped face, emerald green eyes inlaid with flecks of soft gold, small hands that looked delicate as if they would break, and very soft lips. **_

"_**Are y-y-you the doctor?" She asked, her eyes shifting away as she had been staring at him.**_

"_**Dr. Cullen, but you can call me Carlisle." He said much to quickly, smiling at her. "what seems to be the problem here-----."**_

"_**Esme," the girl said, smiling back at him despite the pain she was in. "And this is the problem." She pulled back the sheet from her leg, showing a large purple bruise from which Carlisle could see the bone, almost breaking skin.**_

_**He suddenly felt very protective of her, wanting to take the pain away from her. "How did that happen?" He asked.**_

"_**Well I-," she stopped clearly embarrassed from the blush that spread across her features.**_

"_**I need you to tell me." He said gently.**_

"_**I. I was climbing a tree when I fell out, and well, you know the rest." She said.**_

_**He placed two fingers on the injury, feeling her relax under his icy touch. "Well, Esme, I'm going to have to set this before I can put a cast on it. It might hurt, o you want some pain medicine?" She shook her head, so he placed his hands on her leg and jeked up as softly as she could. She bit her lip form the pain but didn't cry out. He then wrapped it in a cast.**_

"_**Thank you," she said softly. Carlisle was a ware of the almost nonexistent distance between them, and had to move away quickly tp keep from doing something stupid. He gave her some pain pills, which made her sleepy.**_

"_**Your welcome Esme." He spoke very softly as she drifted off to sleep, he kissed her forehead softly and then left the hospital.**_

_**Carlisle moved from Columbus soon after.**_


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 13: Chicago, where the world is changed**

**Spanish Influenza. All the lives it claimed. Just yesterday an entire family all but the father had died. All gone just like that. Carlisle worked tirelessly trying to save them but there wasn't near enough medicine or doctors for all the patients. **

**What was worse, Carlisle had to go home to pretend he needed sleep. He could have kept working, saving lives. But no, he had to be human, for his safety.**

**It was Wednesday, just last Friday a family of patients had been brought in. Well, actually the son had come in carrying his father who was sick. The mother had joined him, then tboth the boy and his mother had fainted, they were also sick. The Masen's.**

**Edward Sr., Elizabeth, and young Edward. He had done the worst thing and become attached to them. Especially the woman and her son. Unfortuantely, Edward Sr. had just passed and he was on his way to tell them. Walking into the wing of the hospital, I saw Elizabeth out of her bed, nursing Edward, again.**

**She was making herself so much worse by doing that. It was true that Edward was far more worse off than she was, Carlisle doubted he would make it through the night. A raw determination was gleaming in the woman's eye as she worked over her son.**

"**Mrs. Masen," Carlisle began, but she did not look up. "I'm very sorry but your husband passed during the night." She didn't look up, she kept working over her son, her expression never changing.**

"**Mrs. Masen you need to stop. You will only make yourself worse." He placed his hands on her shoulders to pull her away from her son.**

**She looked up at him. "Will he live?" she asked fiercely, indicating her son.**

"**I don't know." Carlisle answered truthfully.**

"**You must save him," she said locking her eyes with his.**

"**I'll do my best," He promised. But what was that exactly.**

"**You must. What the others can not so. That is what you must do for my Edward. Save him." she stared at him so intently thaat he was worried. Did she know? And if she did, did she realize what that would mean for her son? To live eternally. But before he could ask she had passed out on the bed, the sickness overcoming her determination.**

**Elizabeth passed not much later. Carlisle was haunted by her words. Edward had hours left. It was now or never. Hw wheeled Elizabeth's body for the morgue and then came back for Edward. Maybe after being alone for so long he would have a companion. That was the last thought that entered his head as the boy's blood gushed into his moth from his neck.**


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 14: Unexpected

Carlisle stayed with Edward through his most of his transformation. It was painful and the boy obviously hurt. Recalling his own transformation, Carlisle felt sympathetic for the boy who probably thought he was dying ND FOR THAt matter going to hell.

On the third day his eyes opened for the first time. Brilliant crimson, and staring straight at Carlisle.

"What should I tell him?" Carlisle thought.

"Everything if you wouldn't mind sir." Edward answered the mental question. He clamped a hand over his mouth, shocked by his voice.

Carlise was shocked, he had said nothing yet the boy answered as if he had spoken aloud. "Well Edward, your not quite what you were at the hospital."

"What do you mean?" The boy asked genuinely puzzled.

"How do you tell someone that they are a vampire?" Carlsile thought to himself.

"A vampire!" Edward yelled, shocked that this man thought him to be so stupid as to believe in vampires. "Now really, what is going on?"

" I'm sorry Edward but its true. We are vampires, We drink blood, we don't age, and we are, quite frankly going to live forever." Carlisle said all this in a rush, as if he didn't Edard would leave or laugh at him.

"Were vampires?" Carlisle nodded. "We don't age?" Carlisle nodded. "We live forever?" Carlisle nodded again. "We drink b-blood?" Carlisle nodded one last time.

"No!" Edward screamed, "I refuse to kill people. You might but I never will. I'd rather die. Where's my family? Do they know I'm here?"

"Edwaard calm down," Carlisle eased, but his words had little effect, if any. "I don't kill humans. I hunt animals."

Edward calmed down, a little. "Oh. Where's my family?"

Carlisle sighed. "I'm very sorry Edward but your parents both passed away at the hospital."

"Why did you do this to me?" Edward asked softly, his red eyes shadowed with grief.

"I-----. Your mother asked me to save you no matter what. That's why. I'm very sorry Edward I know you loved them." Carlisle answered.

"My mother never would have wanted me to be this. She wouldn't have asked you to do this to me." Edward's vpice got higher and higher, "You should have let me die. I'm going to live out my life, or existence as a soulless blood-drinking monster, all because of you."

Carlisle was speechless. Of all the emotions he had been prepared for from happiness to shock to disbelief, he had not anticipated anger. Or the feeling that he should have died with his mother.

"Come on Edward. You need to hunt." Carlisle said, miserable. For a moment it looked like the boy would refuse, but finally he rose from the bed and followed Carlisle outside.

They went deep into the forest. Exchanging no words, except for the occasion that Edward would acknowledge a thought of Carlisle's. It was rare though, and other than that they exchanged no words.

Carlisle was rather depressed, his one shot at a companion and the boy hated him. Edward may have heard this thought but he neither agreed or disagreed with his creator. They drained several deer, and then returned to the house where Carlisle left for his shift.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 15: fighting and the destruction of furniture**

**Edward had lived with Carlisle for little over three months. They exchanged few words, and Carlisle left for his shift the same time every night. One day while Carlisle was working Edward decided to explore the house. He saw various paintings, many books, and a small statue of a building in What he guessed was Italy. Then, as Carlisle came in the door Edwaqrd saw something that infuriated him.**

"**What is this?" He yelled waving them in Carlisle's face. It was indentification papers. They were moving soon and Carlisle had had them made at a local office. Carlisle's was fine, the only thing altered was his date of birth. What had infuriated Edward however was **_**his**_** identity.**

**His date of birth, his age, his hair color, eye color, and height were either correct or would be correct in a few months. His name read Edward Anthony Cullen.**

"**Those," Carlisle answered slowly, "are ID papers. I though it would be easier if we pretended to be related. Like brothers, or something like that."**

"**WE ARE NOT RELATED. BROTHERS OR ANYTHING ELSE." Edward screamed so loud his ears hurt. He then picked up the nearest piece of furniture and threw it at Carlisle. **

**Carlisle caught it, and ducked just in time to dodge a chair aimed at his head. Edward jumped at him, and Carlisle ducked left, causing Edward to land outside in the yard.**

"**Fix it." He said to Carlisle, still gripping the paper in his now sparkling hand.**

"**Okay Edward. Now calm down."Carlisle spoke softly trying to calm the indignant teenager.**

"**I'm going hunting." Edward growled through clenched teeth, then turned on his heel and ran into the forest. Carlisle was left, feeling worse, this boy obviously hated him, what was going t happen.**

**Chapter 15: An old flame**

**Carlisle had moved himself and Edward to Ashland, Wisconsin in hopes that the remote area and small population would be good for Edward. The boy, well 20 year old, was still having difficulties being in close proximities with humans.**

**He had lived with Edward with three years, and their relationship was rocky at best. Carlisle liked Edward, and Edward respected Carlisle. Edward, however, thought that no matter the effort they put forth to preserve human life they were still soulless beings In the eyes of God. Carlisle disagreed entirely. This lead to many arguments in the cullen household.**

**At the moment Carlisle was headed to the small Ashland Hospital, while Edward drove to Duluth to attend a few college courses. Carlisle was glad Edward had found something to do with all of his free time other than question god's judgement of their kind.**

**He pulled in to the near vacant parking lot. He was early, but had to came for today was supposed to be sunny. The secretary was in but no one else, so Carlisle signed in and then went to his office to await patients.**

**Eight long hours later Carlisle was getting ready to leave. If he hadn't known it was impossible he would say he was tired. He didn't even know that this many people lived in Ashland, every resident must have been to the hospital today. **

"**Dr. Cullen," A voice called. He sighed then turned.**

"**Sorry to bother you but there is one more case. In the morgue. We need a doctor to sign it and Snow's already gone. Would you please go?" She asked.**

"**Of course," He sighed the n headed to the morgue. He hated the morgue, it was a dark place. It wasn't hard to find the body, it was the only one in there.**

**Pecularly enough as Carlisle drew closer he heard a fluttering heartbeat, weak but still there. As he drew closer he could hear his breathing increase. He lifted the bloodstained sheet to see an almost unrecognizable body, bloody and torn. I looked at the papers, suicide. I looked at the face. Oh. Dear. God.**

"**Esme. Why have you done this?" He whispered to her. It was then he knew he must save her, he knew his decision was selfish but he couldn't let her die. **

**He bit gently into her neck, careful not to spill to much of the lif-giving blood. He gathered her into his arms and ran to his house.**


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 16: An angel in the darkness

She was lying on his bed. He couldn't stop looking at her, although Edward had left when he first came home. She looked different, older of course, but there was something else. Her body hips were rounded on the edge, her stomach had a small scar on it. Then it hit him.

I've taken a mother from a child. He thought disgusted with himself, there was also another emotion he didn't think he had ever felt before, he didn't recognize it though. However, her having a baby doesn't explain why she would try to kill herself, she didn't seem like the person to abadon her baby. And where was the baby?

"She doesn't have one Carlisle," a new voice spoke from behind him. "He died a fews days after he ws born. A lung infection."

"Oh, thank you Edward," he said turning back to her, "What about the father?"

"I don't know," He said. He spoke measured as if he was having a difficult time processing something. He was staring at Esme, with a somewhat horrified expression. A soft moan escaped her and Edward turned and sprinted from the room.

A few hours later she awoke, taking in the room around her. "Esme," a voice said from beside her, her angel's voice, "I'm so glad your awake."

She turned her head around to look at the person behind thhe voice. Sure enough, there sat Dr. Carlisle Cullen, still as perfect as he was ten years ago, still as young, still as beautiful. He smiled, and she smiled back. Here was the man she wished she had married not------ she couldn't even think his name without crying. But thinking about that brought on a new train of thought.

Her baby. Her tiny baby boy, dead before he had a chance at life. Little Carlisle, named after the man in front of her. The man who she wished was the baby's father. She felt like crying, she thought of her baby, her husband, her angel, and then she was just confused.

"Am I dead?" she asked Carlisle. Amazed by the beutifal shiming of her voice.

"No. your not dead." He said.

"But you haven't changed at all. You look exactly the same as you did ten years ago. If I'm not dead then what's going on." She asked, genuinely puzzled. He looked uncomfortable, and suddenly she was sorry for asking.

"Esme, I'm very sorry, but you are a vampire." Carlisle said softly, knoing she would hear him. She almost laughed.

"Don't laugh. It's true." A new voice spoke up. An young boy with unruly bronze hair.

"Edward, you're back" Carlisle said, "This is Esme."

Edward extended his hand and Esme shook it, still dazed by the two of them.

"A vampire. As in we drink blood and sleep in coffins?" she asked, recalling a book she had once read.

"Sleepong in coffins. No. Drinking blood. Yes." Carlisle answered.

"You-you mean we kill people and drink our blood." She questioned unable to believe Carlisle would do that.

"No. We don't. We drink animal blood." Edward answered instead.

"Animal Blood?"

"That why our eyes are this golden color," Carlisle explained, "You must be thirsty, lets go hunt."

"I think I'll stay here. I have homework." Edward said and then left.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 17: Hunting, not as simple as it sounds

Carlisle took Esme's hand and pulled them carefully in the direction of the forest. He was shocked by the spark the small contact gave him. It seemed to jolt into his long still heart. He found himself staring at her, her face, her eyes, everything. Whilst doing this he noticed something else, her eyes had a strange look about them. 

An odd emotion. When Edward was a newborn, his expression often showed hate, or a hard expression. But her's were different. They looked haunted, as if bothered by something. She turned her head and noticed him staring. She smiled at him, causing him to avert his eyes.

He tried to concentrate on hunting but he couldn't. Every thought had her attached to it and holding her hand was certainly not helping.

"Carlisle," When she spoke it startled him causing him to stop unexpectedly. She stopped beside him, looking confused. "What exactly are we supposed to be hunting?"

"We are looking for animals, like deer." He said slowly, unable to look into her eyes for the embarrassment he felt.

"Oh." Esme said simply then turned to gaze into the trees.

"They are usually a little farther in," Carlisle said to her, gesturing towards the trees. He moved to grab her hand but she had already run ahead. Confused, he sprinted after her.

He found her, draining the blood out of a young buck. She had killed it instinctively, and Carlisle couldn't help but admire that. When it was done, she looked up at Carlisle droppping the deer, horrified.

"What did I just do?" She asked in horror that she had killed something.

"You did what we are supposed to do. It's either animals or humans Esme. I'm sorry, I should have warned you that while you are newborn your instincts will have more control than your mind. You may do things you never thought you would." Carlisle finished, feeling guilty he hadn't explained.

"I--, it's just shocking." She whispered looking down at the deer. "Can we go back?" He nodded and then pulled her back. He wished he comfort her, do something. He wanted to kiss her.

_Where did that come from? _He thought. The thought startled him so much that he pulled into another unexpected stop. Kiss her? What was he thinking? He barely new her, and besides he didn't think she could ever love him. He had made her into this when she had wanted to die and be with her baby. She would never love him.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 18: Holy water ; song inspired

Over the next three months Carlisle found himself rather exasperated, for the first time in his existence, with his work schedule. He worked a lot of shifts, both night and day, various days of the week. This had never bothered him before but now he longed to spend his time at home with Esme.

Ever since his thought almost three months ago, Carlisle had been avoiding her somewhat, only making contact when needed. He had gone and gotten her some things, like clothing, around the second week she had been with them. She had thanked him with a small smile, but best of all his fingers had grazed her skin as he handed them to her.

He had almost kissed her then. Almost. He had wanted to, but instead he had murmured a quiet "your very welcome" to her and then moved quickly down the stairs. As he passed Edward by the piano he thought he heard a, " This is getting ridiculous Carlisle."

That night Carlisle needed to hunt. So did Esme.

"Would you like to go hunting Carlisle?" Esme asked him quietly, noticing his darkening irises.

"Of course." He murmured, before standing and following her out the door. They sped through the forest, running so that there feet barely grazed the ground as they moved. Carlisle glanced over at his companion, he noticed again the haunted look mingled with the freedom of the run. He decided on a whim to ask her

"Esme. I need to ask you something." He stated simply.

"What is that?" she asked genuinely puzzled.

"It's just that everytime I see you I see your smile, and then I see this emotion in your eyes. Like your are being hunted, haunted it bothers me." He awkwardly explained avoiding her eyes. When she said nothing in response he glanced at her, shock wa written over her face as well as fear. _Why is she afraid? _He wondered.

"Carlisle. I thinks it's time I told you the whole truth. I think you have a right to know. Edward already knows, he has seen it in my thoughts." She paused until he gestured to continue.

"It all started after you left. Nothing was quite the same. My parents began to pressure me to get married, and although I had wanted to be a mother I did not wish to marry anyone in our town. The only person I had ever loved was gone." She stopped again, lost in thought.

_Who was it? _He thought desperately.

"When I was twenty years old, my father received a proposal of marriage from an associate of his. My father was thrilled, as was my mother, and he accepted at once. It was then that I realized that my life was pratically at an end, I could never be with the one I loved, I would belong to someone else soon."

"Charles Evenson, my betrothred, was not ugly or anything. He waas just plain and he was not you." She stopped.

_Me? _Carlsile thought shocked.

"On our wedding day sll my friends were so happy for me, so I wore a fake smile on my face all day, just to make them happy. I figured I could learn to like Charles and that this wouldn't be the worst thing to ever happen to me. I have never been more wrong in my life."

"Our first month together was fine. Nothing really happened, charles would leave for work and I would keep the house. Then one night, he came home very late, and drunk. He could barely walk but he said he needed me. I tried to get him to bed, but he refused, he was determined. I said no, that he needed to go to bed."

"This frankly, made him very upset. I have never seen someone so mad. He, literally, tackled me, and forced himself on me. At the end I was crying, I couldn't help it. He didn't like that." She stopped, dry sobbing into her hands.

"He hit me again and again, for a long time. Finally, through the mercy og god he passed out. I laid there bruised and bleeding wondering what went wrong before I finally passed out to."

Carlisle felt hot rage boil through him, like fire through his long empty veins. Someone hurt his Esme, they hit her, made her cry. Instinctively, he reached out his arms and pulled her into his embrace, hugging her shaking form to his chest.

"It carried on like this for months. I was able to do nothing, Charles was my husband so no one would believe me if I told. Besides, in public Charles was a charmer, everyone respected him, they would never suspect he monster inside of him. Only I knew, and I lived in my own personal hell for it. And then everything changed." She clung to Carlisle shirt and dry sobbed into it. He could only hold Esme tighter as she recalled her painful past.

"I found out I was pregnant. It was what I had wanted and from the minute I found out I loved my baby. I new I couldn't let my baby grow up with Charles as it's father. I couldn't let him anywhere near my baby, even if he wished he was the father. That, in fact, was the only regret I have about my baby. Charles was the father not the man I really loved."

"I decided rather quickly the I had to flee from Charles, for my sake and my baby's. I ran to Milwaulkee saying that my husband had died in the war and that I needed to support my baby. I stayed at my cousin's house, where I taught school for the months until the baby was born."

"He came one month early, and the doctors said he was very healthy for such a premature baby. I named him Jeremy Carlisle Platt, after you, and my father. He was buatifal, all I could ever hope for. He was tny but strong."

"A little over a week later I woke one morning to find him in his crib. He was cold. I rushed him to the hospital but they told me he was already dead. An unexpected lung infection. I refused to believe it. Everything I was living for was gone. I couldn't go back to Charles, he would kill me for running away. So I decided the only logical thing to do was to try to join my son." She shuddered and stopped sobbing.

"I went to the cliff and thought about my life. The only truly good thing I could ever recall was our meeting almost ten years ago. You were the only man I ever loved, the only man I could ever love and with that as my last thought I jumped to my would-be death."

"When you bit me I thought heaven was rejecting me, turning me away because of what I had done, but then I woke up and saw you. You would never be in Hell, you would never do anything evil enough to end up there. So I knew there had to be some other explanation. Although this was not what I expected, I'm not complaining."

She finished her story and Carlisle movd his liquid gold eyes down to look at her. _I was the only person she ever loved. I love her too._

And with this thought running through his mind he gently cupped the sides of her face in his hands, and , ignoring he look of shock, pressed his lips softly to hers.

He felt her stiffen in surprise, and then take her hands to wind around his neck to pull him closer. They got lost in the kiss, it showing all the love they had felt, but never been able to show, for each other. As far as he was concerned everything was perfect.


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 19: A time for questions and happy answeres**

"**Have fun?" Edward asked as Carlisle and Esme returned. His eyes twinkled with amusment as Esme and Carlisle both looked away from him and sprand apart form each other.**

"**Sorry if we made you uncomfortable Edward." Carlisle mumbled.**

"**Uncomfortable? I have been waiting for the two of you to get together for a long time. To be frank, your thoughts were driving me a bit insane." He replied with a smile to show that he was joking, but happy none the less.**

"**I'll be upstairs." Esme called before rushing up the stairs. Carlisle looked after her until she disappeared from sight, resulting in an unconventional eye roll from Edward. He sat down in his arm chair, a thoughtful look on his face.**

"**Could you do a favor for me Edward?" He asked suddenly.**

"**What is it?" Edward asked never breaking eye contact with the book he was reading.**

"**Go to the hospital tomorrow," He stopped, when Edward froze, "And tell them I'm sick." Edward relaxed, somewhat.**

"**Sure, Carlisle," He smiled when he caught his adoptive fathers thoughts, "I think two diamonds would work nicely."**

**The next day Carlisle set out at his usual time, as not to draw Esme's attention to him. However, instead of going to the hospital, he headed for the small town of Duluth, just outside of Ashland.**

**After he parked the car, Carlisle got out and proceeded to walk down main street. He passed many shops, from a women's apparel (where he bought Esme clothes many months ago), to a butcher shop on the south end. He walked for nearly an hour before he found what he was looking for.**

**He turned into the small jewelry shop. He went straight to the glass case in front, looking lost as he gazed over them. "Can I help you sir?" A light human's voice asked form the other end of the building.**

"**Yes. Actually, I would like to place an order." Carlisle said, finally finding the perfect one.**


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 20 It all breaks apart

Carlisle pulled into the driveway at the side of the house. He felt the small box in his pocket, it reassured him as he moved closer to the front of the house. However what he saw there what not at all what he was expecting.

Edward was laying on the ground his arms pinned to his sides, by Esme? _What's going on? Have they been arguing? _Then he realized the problem. A little farther up from the house was a mailman. He was dead, with the blood pouring out of him from two bitemarks on his neck. One of them had slipped.

He ran to the pair, attempting to pull Esme off of Edward. She came off immediately, jumping into Carlisle's embrace, sobbing into his hirt. Carlisle glanced at Edward, checking to see if he was okay. He was fine. And most importantly, his eyes were still their golden-brown no the red, that they would be had he killed the human.

That meant that Esme killed him. Her newborn senses completely controlled by bloodlust. He pulled her close to him, letting her be sad.

"Shhh. It's okay Esme. It's okay," Carlisle murmered nto her hair.

"I killed him Carlisle. What if he had a family? Friends? Oh Carlisle, what have I done?" She cried into his shirt. There was nothing he could say. He could answer none of her questions, never having killed anyone. He was lost.

Edward silently rose to his feet, looking just as depressed as Esme. Carlisle felt guilt course through him. This never should have happened, he never should have left Edward home alone with a newborn. He never should have left Esme by herself. This was all his fault. He held Esme tighter, realizing that once she figured out that this was his fault, she would never love him.


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 21 Amidst the tradgedy, there is light

The next day was, to be frank, awful. Carlisle was restless outside of Esme's bedroom. She had locked herself in there, avoiding them completely. It bothered him that she wouldn't allow him to help her through this. He wanted to, needed to help her. They could get through this together.

Finally, after three long days of pacing continuous pacing, Esme emerged from her bedroom. Carlisle looked up at her from his position on the bottom of the stairs. She looked back in his direction, but unable to meet his eye.

"Esme," He said softly. She glanced up at him but quickly looked away.

"What am I Carlisle? Whats the point in living if I'm just going to be a monster?" She replied, looking at the ground. A pang of sorrow rocked Carlisle, he still blamed himself for what had happened.

"You' re not a monster Esme. You are just a newborn, and I never should have left you lone. I'm sorry," Carlisle answered taking a step closer to her.

"I love you Esme," he whispered to her as she shied away from his attempt to embrace her.

"How can you love me? I've killed a person Carlisle, you deserve someone better than that," Esme said, her eyes sad with the thought that she would never be good enough for him.

"That. Is. Not. True," He replied, "I love you and only you Esme. I don't want anyone else, you are the only person I have ever loved." Carlisle protested, before he was finally able to hug her.

She shook her head slowly, disagreeing with him. He souldn't love her. A man was dead because of her. But this thought ended as he placed his lips on hers softly. She kissed him back, thrilled to see that his words were true.

"Will you marry me Esme," he asked as soon as he stopped kissing her.

"Of course Carlisle," She answered feverishly. A soon as the words passed her lips he picked her up and swirled her around in his arms, the joyous moment lighting the mood tremendously. He pulled the ring out and placed it on her finger.

As they pulled into one last kiss, before going to tell Edward the happy news, they thought that there was nothing for perfect than this moment.


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter 22: Something old, Something new, Something borrowed, and Something Blue**

**Esme and Edward busied themselves in plans for the wedding. They went to various shops in town, being careful of course, while Carlisle spent the day at work.**

**Together they made a guest list. Well, a atendee list. The wedding would consist of Carlisle and Esme, the preacher, and Edward, who would be giving Esme away as well as being the best man. **

**It was the two of them for the majority of the planning. Edward arranged for an elderly pastor to do the wedding. He lived a little farther away from Duluth, and he was the best option for someone to marry them. Esme was supposed to be dead, so if someone was to see her, that would actually pay attention to how she looked, they could confromt future problems. This elderly man would probably pass away within two years anyway, so he was ideal for the ceremony.**

**As for the dress they decided to go with the traditional white gown. Esme decided that Carlisle and Edward should wear blue ties and under-vests, as she thought it looked good on them. Then they were faced with whether or not they would follow the traditions laid forth by thousands of marriges. **

"**We need something old Edward," she explained, mentioning the old poem. He rushed up the stairs and returned with a small bracelet. It was pure silver, inlaid with several intricate designs.**

"**Oh, Edward. Where did you get it?" She breathed.**

"**Carlisle had it, but he's forgotten it by now. It belonged to his mother that he never knew." Edward explained, clasping the bracelet on her wrist to make sure it fit.**

"**Alright then. Now we need something new." she recited the next line of the old saying. She pulled out a small beret they had bought while shopping. "this will do nicely."**

"**Something borrowed, Edward. Where will get something borrowed?" she asked.**

**Edward reached into his pocket excitedly, as if he were waiting for her to answer this question. In his hand was a necklace. It was comprised of a silver chain, and a small cross pendant. He placd it around her neck before she could even react.**

"**Whose is this Edward?" she asked, very curious.**

"**It belonged to my mother, she wore it when she and my father got married all those years ago." He explained softly. "It seems fitting to let you wear it."**

"**Thank you Edward. This means so much to me." She turned and gave him a hug, squeezing him hard to even stop a vampire from breathing.**

"**Your very welcome," he managed to get out before she released him.**

"**Now we just need something blue and we are ready to go." Esme said excitedly.**

"**How about these?" Edward asked, producing two matcing ribbons to go on Esme's shoes.**

"**These will be perfect. Now I'm going to go fix my hair for tomorrow. Don't let Carlisle see me, you know the tradition." she exclaimed and then hurried away to prepare.**

"**And don't forget to get ready!"**


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter 24: A night to remember

Silence filled the the Chrysler as they drove down several roads, deep into the heart of the northern country. Esme was lost in both happy thoughts and incredible insecurity. She was married to Carlisle Cullen, the person she had loved for as long as she could remember. But at the same time, as they drew closer to her honeymoon, she was filled with terrible thoughts of her past marriage. Yes, her nervousness was to be expected.

Carlisle's however was a shock to him. It was true that he had never been with another being like this, human or vampire. He had never even kissed anyone other than Esme. In truth, he was nervous as hell. However nervous he was though, some part of him was very eager to be with Esme. He loved Esme and he wanted to show her that.

"How much farther Carlisle?" He spft voice rattled him out of his thoughts.

"Well, actually. We are here." He replied, pulling into a lond driveway, and stopping the car. "I'll get the trunks." she nodded and he unbuckled his seatbelt. She reache down the to do the same and there hands brushed. He jerked his head up to find it mere centimeters away from her face.

She leaned into him and kissed him. She deepened it and leaned onto him harder, he was pushing against his door. It spranfg open and they fell into the soft snow, that littered the ground of the Northern United States. They hardly noticed.

They continued like this, locked in their embrace for several more minutes, never wanting to stop. What finally led them to suddenly stop was a mystery to both but they did.

"I'll get the suitcases. Why don't you go pick out a room?" Carlisle said quickly, helping her off the icy ground. She smiled and then turned to go inside. He hurrid to get the bags out of the trunk, running through the door. His wife's scent wafted down the stairs from one of the many bedrooms in the large cabin.

He jumped up the stairs, and burst into the bedroom, to find Esme starng out the small window ant the snow. He walked to join her, wrapping his arms around her waist, and resting his chin on her shoulder.

"Beautiful isn't it Carlisle?" She questioned, reaching her hands back to run them through the blonde hair on the back of his head.

"Hardly," He answered. She gave him a questioning look. "Not compared to you." She smiled at that, and turned to kiss him. It soon delved into something deeper and Carlisle maneuvered them to lay die by side, locked in an embrace, on the large bed.

All their nervousness forgotten, Esme moved to unbutton the shirt that Carlisle had looked so dazzling in only hours earlier. They came together for the first time.

* * *

Carlisle was laying on the bed, Esme was laying on top of him, tracing patterns into his bare chest. He felt utterly relaxed and at peace. He smiled to himself, "I love you" , he said over and over. The new couple watched the snow fall outside and were surprised by the majestic beauty the small white flakes created, turning the outside world into a swirling mass of white.


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter 24: A night to remember

Silence filled the the Chrysler as they drove down several roads, deep into the heart of the northern country. Esme was lost in both happy thoughts and incredible insecurity. She was married to Carlisle Cullen, the person she had loved for as long as she could remember. But at the same time, as they drew closer to her honeymoon, she was filled with terrible thoughts of her past marriage. Yes, her nervousness was to be expected.

Carlisle's however was a shock to him. It was true that he had never been with another being like this, human or vampire. He had never even kissed anyone other than Esme. In truth, he was nervous as hell. However nervous he was though, some part of him was very eager to be with Esme. He loved Esme and he wanted to show her that.

"How much farther Carlisle?" He spft voice rattled him out of his thoughts.

"Well, actually. We are here." He replied, pulling into a lond driveway, and stopping the car. "I'll get the trunks." she nodded and he unbuckled his seatbelt. She reache down the to do the same and there hands brushed. He jerked his head up to find it mere centimeters away from her face.

She leaned into him and kissed him. She deepened it and leaned onto him harder, he was pushing against his door. It spranfg open and they fell into the soft snow, that littered the ground of the Northern United States. They hardly noticed.

They continued like this, locked in their embrace for several more minutes, never wanting to stop. What finally led them to suddenly stop was a mystery to both but they did.

"I'll get the suitcases. Why don't you go pick out a room?" Carlisle said quickly, helping her off the icy ground. She smiled and then turned to go inside. He hurrid to get the bags out of the trunk, running through the door. His wife's scent wafted down the stairs from one of the many bedrooms in the large cabin.

He jumped up the stairs, and burst into the bedroom, to find Esme starng out the small window ant the snow. He walked to join her, wrapping his arms around her waist, and resting his chin on her shoulder.

"Beautiful isn't it Carlisle?" She questioned, reaching her hands back to run them through the blonde hair on the back of his head.

"Hardly," He answered. She gave him a questioning look. "Not compared to you." She smiled at that, and turned to kiss him. It soon delved into something deeper and Carlisle maneuvered them to lay die by side, locked in an embrace, on the large bed.

All their nervousness forgotten, Esme moved to unbutton the shirt that Carlisle had looked so dazzling in only hours earlier. They came together for the first time.

* * *

Carlisle was laying on the bed, Esme was laying on top of him, tracing patterns into his bare chest. He felt utterly relaxed and at peace. He smiled to himself, "I love you" , he said over and over. The new couple watched the snow fall outside and were surprised by the majestic beauty the small white flakes created, turning the outside world into a swirling mass of white.


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter 25: Life together

As far as he was concerned his life was more than perfect. His small, yet stable family was finally complete. He was married to the love of his existence, and Edward, as temperamental as he might be, was finally fitting in as Carlisle's son.

He spent his days at the hospital, and his nights in the company of his wife and son. It was blissful, serene, peaceful and everything was exactly the way it should be. He never wanted it to change, and now it looked like it never would.

Edward had enrolled at the small community college one town over, and he had bought several catalogs from which Esme could order several items. She had bought several kinds of flowers, and many antiques she could fix up, and decorate with around the house.

HE loved his family, however odd tey may be, but things were far from perfect. Edward was having problems. He had come home early from school several times in the past month, struggling with his undeniable thirst. But he held strong, and Carlsile was happy with him.

Also, Esme scarcely left the house. And when she did she never ventured further than the front yard, for fear that history would repeat itself. She was terrified of killing another human. When the mail man came to the house she locked herself in the bedroom on the top floor.

But, they were happy. They were held together by love, not exactly a common vampire emotion. He realized something else. Since the arrival of Esme into their family, the tension between himself and Edward had become almost nonexistent.

It was like Edward had finally come to grips with his vampiric nature, seeing another person accept this lifestyle in stride. Esme had adapted easily, and was a wonderful person. Maybe Edward saw this and no longer thought of himself as a bloodthirsty monster. Perhaps he thought he could be more than that. He thought he could be happy as an immortal.

Carlisle was thrilled for his son and wife. They were fitting into this lifestyle perfectly. He couldn't have asked for more.


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter 24 A parting of ways:

Carlisle pulled his Chrysler into the driveway next to the house, and immediately knew something was wrong. Inside the house hushed voices talked at such a volume that even with his advanced senses he couldn't hear what they were saying. He knew there owners though. One was Edward, the other, his wife.

Their voices sounded tense, even though he couldn't decipher there words. A thousand different scenario's raced through his mind. The Volturi? Nomads? Another dead human? His mind went straight to panic mode, and he sprinted to the front door.

Grasping the handle so hard that the brass bent tot eh shape of his hadn, he pushed open the wooden door. There was no emergency that he could see, but the tension in the room was so thick he almost choked. Edward was standing with his back to the door, facing Esme, who was staring at him with pain, grief, and horror. What had happened?

"Carlisle," Relief immediately washed over her features as she ran to him, and pulled him into a tight embrace. He wrapped his arms around her small form and she buried her face in his chest.

"What's going on? Edward? Esme?" Carlisle was very confused. The pieces of the puzzle didn't add up quite right. Was something wrong with Esme or Edward?

"Carlisle," Edward said simply, starting to turn and face his father figure. "I have to leave."

"Wh--?" His question stopped halfway through. The front of Edward's shirt had a few red splotches, some people may have thought it was paint, The same red also tinged the edges of his mouth. But worst of all, his eyes were stained a brilliant crimson, a color that they hadn't been since Edward was a newborn.

"I can't live like this anymore. This lifestyle doesn't work for me." Edward spoke softly, but firmly, as if daring them to argue with him.

"You don't have to leave Edward. We can help you. Killing people isn't right." Carlisle stopped. "Your not a murderer Edward."

"I can't help it Carlisle. For months I've been fighting this unbearable thirst. Going to class and it's killing me. But I fought it, for all the innocen people who didn't deserve to be killed. But that changed. Not everyone's innocent." Edward explained, his voice getting louder and louder.

"IO can find the one's that aren't. The murderers, the criminals. I can hunt them. Get rid of them before they hurt people. It makes sense. don't you see that?" Edward stepped closer to the pair in the doorway, as if that would make them agree with him.

Carlisle's gaze reflected Esme's horror. "Edward. You can't just chose who dies. Your not God don't do this. You're a good person."

"But you did Carlisle! You turned me into a vampire. You turned Esme into a vampire. You could have let us die. You've seen hundreds of people die, but you don't save them. What was so special about us?" Edward was yelling now.

Edward. Son--," Carlisle started, but was interrupted by the furious seventeen year old.

"Bye Carlisle. Bye Esme." And with that Edward ran out the door and disappeared into the growing dusk. Both vampires stared after him in disbelief.

"Carlisle, my son, he's; he's gone." Esme dry sobbed into Carlisle's chest and he pulled her close to him. "We should go after him, bring him back to us…"

"He wont come Esme. He's made up his mind. All we can do is hope he comes back, and welcome him back when he does." It broke his heart to say that. To admit that his son was gone, and they weren't going after him. He was gone, maybe forever, and he had just let him walk away.

A/N I don't like this chapter. It makes me sad and was hard to write! Please review!!!! Please!!!!!!!!


	25. Authors Note

A/N I don't own Twilight, o any of the characters


	26. Chapter 25

Chapter 25: Broken

Esme was still here. He still worked at the hospital. They still went hunting together once every two weeks. But nothing was the same, it never would be. Edward was gone. There small family, that had been so perfect, was torn. A piece was ripped out of it, a piece that couldn't be replaced.

The piano in the corner was gathering dust form lack of use. Edward's books from college were resting on the side table, right where he left them. Even Edward's old Chrysler was sitting in the driveway, untouched and dirty. It had hardly stopped raining, barely enough for them to hunt. It was like whole world was crying for the loss of his son.

His wife was different. She was melancholy for most of the day, rarely smiling at all. It seems she had lost her passion for decorating. The flowers, and furniture she had ordered stayed packaged in boxes and bags. She spent a the majority of her time sitting on there coach, watching the darkening skies and the rain as it fell softly to the ground.

Carlisle would stand in the doorway and watch her, feeling saddend about the far away look in her eyes. "Where do you think he is?" she asked quietly.

"I don't know. Esme, I'm sure wherever he is he's happy." Carlisle answered. She rose uo from the couch and walked over to him, wrapping her arms around his middle.

"Why did he leave, Carlisle? Why did he leave?" She looked up at him, her eyes full of grief and confusion. He didn't have an answer to her question. Why had Edward left? He was a good person, Carlisle knew that. How could he kill people? How could he kill humans just for blood? It made no sense.

He leaned down to her face, and kissed her softly. But even that didn't feel the same. Carlisle had thought that his and his wife's relationship had had nothing to do with their teenage son, but maybe it had. Or maybe it was the dismal mood that hung over the house that seemed to make everything less enjoyable.

Carlisle couldn't see Edward as a nomad. But he knew that if Edward continued on this "diet" he would have no choice but to be one. It saddened him to think of his son as a lonely person, traveling the world and never really belonging to anything, or anywhere. But Carlisle hoped that wherever he was, that Edward would be safe. And maybe he would realize how much his leaving was hurting them, he knew it was a long shot, but he hoped his son would come home.


	27. Chapter 26

Chapter 27: Relocation

Carlisle pulled his car slowly into the driveway, parking it in its usual place next to Edward's. He sees the car and sighs loudly. It hasn't gotten better, if anything it has gotten worse. The phrase "Time Heals All Wounds" is incredibly misleading. Of course they were immortals; time was a much more definitive concept to them than it was to humans. Somehow, that thought didn't make it any better.

Esme was the only light in Carlisle's life. She pulled him out of his darker days, and brightened the mood. Of course, even his wife's usual cheerful demeanor had dulled. It was fading. Everything at their house reminded them of Edward. They needed to leave, or the lasting depression would only worsen as time went on. It was then that he made the decision. They were moving, as soon as they could.

He spent the next few days talking to several people and gathering newspapers. He found different ones for several places, stretching from Oregon to Maine. A few stuck out in his mind. One for a small house in rural eastern Kentucky, one for a small house in Southern Alabama, and finally, one for a good sized home in Rochester, New York. He gathered all of them up in his car and took them home to Esme.

He stepped in the doorway to be greeted by her with a small kiss and a brief hug. "Your back." She said simply. A small smile graced her features, a ghost of what it used to be.

"Esme. I brought these home with me today." He held up the sack he had brought in, that held all the housing ads. "People at the hospital and in town are getting suspicious. We have to move."

She looked up at him. Her expression was hard to read, it was more of a question. It said," Are we really going to leave here? Are we going to leave Edward?" With a pang, Carlisle realized that this was true. If they left here, there was a chance that if Edward was going to return he would not be able to find them, wherever they ended up. Was he really willing to chance that?

"We have to go, love. We can't stay here forever; wherever we go Edward will find us." He attempted to sound reassuring, but the way he said it he sounded more like he was talking to himself. Trying to tell himself that that was true, when he really didn't feel that way. "Let's take a look at these."

Esme gazed at each one of the ads, interest finally sparking in her eyes a she commented on the design of each home, and the location. "I've always wanted to see New York Carlisle." She commented when they found the one for Rochester.

"Wherever you want to go, Esme. We will." Carlisle gazed down at her, "I would like to see New York too." She smiled up at him and kissed him lightly before riding off the couch.

"I'll start packing up Carlisle. It will take a lot of work to move out of this place." She turned and headed off down the hallway.

In an instant he was behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her close to him. "You know I don't have to leave for a few hours. You can always pack later."


	28. Chapter 27

Chapter 27: Preparations

Carlisle and Esme worked over the next few days, arranging for transport to Rochester, and packing up all there things in boxes so they could be moved. When Carlisle returned form the hospital each day, he would spend time with his wife, packing all there things up, sealing there memories into packages.

Carlisle was spending the day packing the books from hi study. Handwritten medical texts form years ago, anatomy guides, and slightly yellowed newspaper clippings about medical discoveries. He sorted and packaged them until the bookshelves became bare and glistening. He carried all the boxes down the stairs into the front room and stacked them with the assortment of others.

He didn't see Esme in the front room. She had been down there moments ago, straitening boxes and preparing them for the trip. "Esme?" He called, but no answer.

Frowning to himself he went upstairs. He didn't hear anything, but strong waves of her floral scent wafted out of the room at the end of the hall. Edward's room.

Concerned he went down the hall, and pushed open the door. It looked exactly the same as it had when his son had abandoned them and left to travel by himself. With the exception of Esme, seated at the small writing desk in the far corner of the room.

She was reading a small piece of paper that she held in tightly in her hands. Being absolutely silent Carlisle walked over behind her and put his hands on her shoulder. She didn't move at his touch, just remained silent and continued to gaze at the page.

Carlisle glanced at the paper. It was a note page. Musical notes. The entire page was laid out with scales, and measures. The notes were etched across the paper in Edward's elegant manuscript. But most of all, at the top of the page was the title of Edward's composition.

"Esme".

He had written it for the woman he thought of as a mother. She had suggested that he compose music for his piano before, but Carlisle wasn't aware that he had actually take the the idea to heart. He could understand why Esme was so speechless when she looked at the paper.

This was from Edward. One of the last connections they had to their missing son. "Bring it with us Esme." Carlisle said suddenly, breaking the silence.

As if just noticing her husband's arrival in the room, Esme stiffened and looked up at him. She smiled briefly at him, before she nodded and rose out of her chair. Carlisle wrapped his arm around her and she put her head on his chest.

"Why did he have to leave Carlisle? Why couldn't he stay?" Esme asked. Carlisle couldn't answer; just hold her tighter, as they went through this together.

"Why don't you put that in a box so we can take it with us?" Carlisle said softly.

Esme nodded again, and pulled out of his arms to pack up the song in a box of Edward's things that Carlisle hadn't even noticed on entering the room. He sighed. How could this ever be fixed?


	29. Chapter 28

(A/N) Sorry for the long to all the people who read this story, I lost my inspiration to write it for a while, but picked it up. Hope this chapter was worth it, please R&R!

Chapter 28: A Fresh Start

Carlisle and Esme got into his car silently. Carlisle sat in the driver's seat, staring at the house he had come to call home. He had "met" his wife there, and he had finally found a family inside of its walls. He felt that by leaving the house, they were leaving all of that behind, he felt like they were leaving Edward behind. Even though there son had been gone for over a month, his loss still weighed heavy on both of his parents hearts. Both of them felt that by leaving this house they were giving up on their final chance to see their son returned home to them.

Glancing over at his wife, whose emotions were clearly written on her face, Carlisle knew that if he didn't pull out now, neither one of them would be able to leave this place. So sighing so softly his wife's supersensitive ears couldn't even pick it up, he brought the engine to life. Giving her face one last glance, he backed them slowly out of the driveway and pulled away from the house they had called home for so long.

Esme had brought a book for the long drive, but she spent he first half of the drive looking out of her passenger side window. Gazing at the landscape as they traveled across the scenic countryside to their new lives.

"Carlisle." She said, looking at her husband in the driver's seat. Trusting his vampire instincts and the fact that there was very little traffic on the road, he turned to face her.

"Yes, sweetheart?" He asked, concerned for her.

"It's just. I'm scared." She stopped, and her brow furrowed in thought.

"What are you worried about, Esme?" He asked her, even though he already knew her answer to his question.

"Were leaving this house, and everything we've formed there. It feels like were leaving our lives and starting new ones." She paused, and added, almost inaudibly, "I feel like were leaving Edward."

Despite the fact that they were driving, Carlisle wrapped an arm around her shoulders, and pulled her close to him, hugging her as best as he could in the small car. He kissed her forehead softly, showing her that he understood.

"Were not leaving Edward, Esme. He'll find us." He said softly, leaning back over to his seat and turning his attention to the road. She opened her book, but Carlisle could tell that she wasn't really focusing on it. He knew that she was still bothered by there leaving, but that didn't meant that he knew how to help her. Comforting people was not exactly a strong point of his.

After an hour of silence, with only the rumble of the car engine to disrupt the quiet atmosphere, Carlisle decided to start up another conversation. "What do you think of the house?"

Esme looked up, startled that he was talking. "It's nice." She said.

"You know, when we get there you can fix it up if you want to. I think it could use your touch." Carlisle told her, trying to sound upbeat in spite of the situation. She smiled at him, looking slightly embarrassed at his attention to her.

"In fact. If you still wanted that garden I'm sure we could look at adding an extra wing to the house, like a sort of greenhouse." He was completely improvising, but it came out better than he thought. She smiled at the idea and the atmosphere in the car brightened a bit.

A half hour later, Carlisle pulled down a back road, behind the local hospital. He stopped the car outside of a large white house, and let out a long breath. This was there new home. Maybe things would be better here.

(A/N) I'm sorry the chapters are so short. I just find it hard to do long ones on this story, sorry. Please R&R


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